The Herd Mentality

Within forums and support groups that exist for ex members of cults , a number of fights and people taking swipes at each other, continue to happen . The ongoing situation remains kind of septic. Some folks seem to have decided ? that humans are all clones of each other or something,whom they must expect will have all dealt with exactly the same situations as they did. Maybe ? its got something to do with the herd mentality type of thought process happening http://psychcentral.com/news/2008/02/15/herd-mentality-explained/1922.html

 Who knows for sure. I cant say i fully understand it as yet. I’m still trying to piece it all together slowly bit by bit myself . Trying to gain more better understanding, of exactly what’s going-down here , and likely to be the general cause of these  tense situations that suddenly erupt. But so far i’m picking , it most likely at least has something to do with how peoples lives are not always all made up of the same type experiences. There is lots of different aspects at work in different peoples live, that will help decide the outcome of the end result of this equation . And if one doesn’t remember to apply a more scientific type methodical outlook , in their approach to making decisions about general conclusions they made, in how they judge and feel about other folk who’s quite likely just different to them . Then i wonder, is their conclusions they feel so-free to be quick to make, more likely ? to be about some real good well-thought-out  knowledge ,or not 

For one instance, lets take a look at this character here, who goes by the name Roddle . In general seems a nice enough guy. From my own experience in observing this fellow a little bit over the years , its been plain to see this guy is most often , kind of cheerful and happy, compared to what some others are. Indeed he’s often to be found in a rather jovial mood , posting comments on a thread called spoof reading.

 But now and then it seem that he don’t like the way some other people are reacting. Here is an example of one of his latest comments.

 “Joan, you are a saint. Most of us here (me included) sit at our keyboard and complain about what should be done, but you are doing it every day, for the right reasons and from the heart.

It’s very much appreciated and as Phil T said – please keep up the good work! For as long as you can put up with the way they treat you in return.”

roddle  http://peebs.net/forums/The_Coffee_Shop/form-over-substance

 Maye im just misunderstanding things myself. It can be real easy to do that on forums online. But at first glance anyway, this comment sounds kind of all-inclusive. Because we see its got the (me included) words-bit been included in it. But why the need to add “for the right reasons and from the heart” . Is this person making a judgment call ? , that they feel some other folk just hang around peebs net ,for all the wrong reasons . And maybe its saying that he feels that some folks just don’t have a heart ? or something. And why the need to even say folks are doing wrong for complaining ? . Would Roddle far prefer that some other folks would just shut-up or something . Maybe  Roddle has judged and decided how they  should need to. And if some folks dare to discuss stuff, that Roddle doesn’t quite like being discussed , are they just automatically people who will only complain , but wont ever do nothing . He dont even make it very clear who he is even talking about. I noticed how people stopped commenting after it were said.
 
But hey wait on, could it not also be something ? to do with some people just maybe feeling far too alone to feel like they may even have enough strength to do anything more . Combined with  deep seated feelings, of being-helpless , too.. Not everyone had retained the moral support of family. To help them adjust through tougher times, and make them want to just keep on keeping on. 
 
Would Roddle  even need consider these “alternative” situations himself. So as to better understand “others” , if he would like to. Maybe we should just take a wee look at an acount of Roddles own escape situation , from within the exclusive brethren cult .  By reading a little about it ,as he says it was,when written within his own words

Roddle himself said

” Yes David,

Frank Frost was one of the defendants in the 1974 split.

My family left the hard-line exclusives in 1970 and stayed together in the 1972 split between the Rentons and Strangs (we became Strangs).

By 1974 however I had moved further away from brethrenism than my parents so they went on to follow Frank Frost while my 3 siblings and I stepped down a level and followed the Rogers/Bacon/Twinam faction. (The current male co-host of this website is the son of said Laurie Twinam).

Two of my siblings and I later dropped out of brethrenism altogether while the remaining brother claims to be free of it but still drives 50 miles every Sunday to meet with a group of about 6!

At some stage the Frosts then split into Hard and Soft (I think early 90s, but have never managed to get my mother to confirm this. Surprisingly she ended up in the Soft Frosts but I think she followed the majority, or just her closest friends, as I have no doubt she would have been a Hard Frost if she had made an independent decision. Sadly she is now in high-dependency nursing care and hardly knows who she is, let along whether she is a Hard or a Soft Frost! “

See here  http://peebs.net/forums/The_Coffee_Shop/exclusivism-is-the-key-to-cults#post-31124

Straight away we see, how it seems Roddles family left while still together ,and then seems they also pretty much have stayed together thereafter as well too . While a number of other ex eb families didn’t have any such good-luck like Roddle’s family did. Seems like the worst of it for Roddle was , his mum still has stayed within the hard frosts ,or soft frosts or what ever .

While some others of us may have never ever even seen our own parents ever again , after leaving the eb.

Roddle is a little miffed ,that one brother would still travel 50miles every sunday to an ex eb type gathering. While some of us will now have the type of ex eb brothers and sisters, whom do often seem to almost subconsciously tend to act far more like an enemy ,than even being what we could still really like to call family, or brother or sister . So badly split and divided and distant did we grow to become, over the time we spent existing apart from each other.

 But with Roddle , well it almost seem he thinks we should all learn  how to be just like he is. Roddle is a little sad mum “is now in high-dependency nursing care and hardly knows who she is, let along whether she is a Hard or a Soft Frost!” 

But hold on , some of us ex eb might only wished our mum was a soft/hard frost , and we wouldn’t even mind so much either ,if it just were that she were getting old, and maybe needing to be in high-dependency nursing care  .

For indeed , for some of us ex eb, it would have just been real-great, to just have had the good-luck, of a little more time and good memories of us all being together . Such memories for us to also have to retain, and still hang-onto , long after she would pass away in death .

Speaking for myself ,when my own mother died only a few months back , i only ended up feeling real guilty about myself , about my lack of reaction to it . Simply because over the many years we had spent apart , id just grown to become so very-distant from mum . That nothing much even seemed to change for me about life, even when they rang to tell me our mum had passed away. For the eb separation, had long-ago already made it kind of feel like our mum already died very many years ago already. Such is the deep seated affect of eb separation . Meaning sadly, i didn’t even shed a tear . The separation (dead feeling) just felt like it suddenly became more real-final , is about all, the affect it had on me.

Some of us have gone through the personal experience of family members trying to commit suicide as well. Not just the once, either , but instead we been through experiencing it twice . When ever we tried meeting up together as ex eb brothers and sisters , the sort of hell it seemed like we always needed to go through , still hadn’t yet stopped .It carries on . Due to our collective great lack of knowledge needed, of how to actually go about,the art of really being a real close loving caring family. When ever we meet together, some sort of nasty-shit still seems to need to continue to keep on happening. If i were really minded to do so,i could sure tell plenty more personal stories too, of family . Acounts of stuff that happened ,that might have some people even want to be questioning and asking themselves, if i’m really even sure i’m actually talking about some of my own flesh and blood. But i’d rather not. Not right now anyway.

This is how separation via cult practices , really has an extremely detrimental affect on some people. And unless people have personal experience of it ,then maybe its not always quite so easy to even begin to fully understand it. In my last post about Mp Robert Halfon, you’ll also see i’ve posted some scholarly studies, explaining exactly what can happen to people, who’s been put under the distructive spell, of these sort of circumstances. It changes people . And not in very nice ways either.

There is one guy who visits peebs net sometime, with a forum name Awake . And he’s quite different too, to many other folk who will also visit peebs net. For one thing he has some very different type faith beliefs , that are not considered mainstream. Folks on peebs net will tend to pick on him. See here for just one-instance http://peebs.net/forums/debates-and-discussions/forgiving-the-exclusive-brethren/page/3

 The story of this guys escape from ebism ,is he tried standing up to his own eb brethren, within his own home town. About the immoral action of one James Talor jnr . For information about a description of the sort of immoral action i’m talking about, why not have a little read here http://peebs.net/a-short-history-of-the-exclusive-brethren/

Anyway , ive been told , that one day Awake decided he needed to try discussing it within his own ex assembly. He was just promptly ridiculed excommunicated and dumped out on the streets, being left entirely on his own, to try and quickly learn how to fend for himself . Even though he were still quite a young person.

Yet still seems , like very few other ex eb will even bother to just stop and consider what sort of profound affect this may have even had on Awake. No they wont bother . They will just tend to rather enjoy picking on him anyway . Maybe ? because they tend to think he should also need to be and act ,just like every other ex eb is , right ?

The other day on another thread an anonymous commenter Chchnz, got angry and flung some sort of verbal-abuse toward another commenter named Anonymous disciple . see here http://peebs.net/forums/The_Coffee_Shop/happiness/page/5

 Anonymous disciple seems like they is a very religious fundamental type ,who is also pretty anti about sexual things too . Such as anyone getting involved in gay relationships and suchlike . Seems in his own mind, he decided such action should still be deemed as extreme disgust, revulsion, abhorrence and as an abomination and suchlike . And he is more than prepared to be quite feely vocal in simply judging and openly deeming it to be as such too. To which very few there, will even care to bother to even complain much about .

Meaning it seems its thought quite ok? to verbally openly abuse people in this manner , so long as the roots of this thought-process ,is also thought to be biblical

 Yet when anonymous commenter Chchnz , flings some sort of verbal anger his way . Suddenly everyone’s jumping on anonymous commenter Chchnz , and kicking him off the forum ,even demanding he would have need to apologize , if he wishes to even be allowed to make anymore comments.

 Now i understand how verbal abuse can tend to offend. And im not interested in condoning it. But i also understand that verbal abuse , even when spoken within frame of a type of faithful righteousness sort of mood ,in the long-run still can also tend to have a profound offensive affect , on some people , specially those whom may have also been very hurt and harmed , by the faithful fudimental types in some way or other. Cause it makes them tend to feel very anti about all fundimentalism , as a whole.

But do many of these people ever stop for a moment or two to bother to just be considering this ? . Doesnt seem like it. I really cant say that i see that they often do. Why is that ? . Maybe ? its because they came from a cult , still retain a herd mentality , and still expect that everyone should still have needs , to always be, and react , in exactly the same way as them.

Its all a pretty sad thing really . Well thats the way it seems to me at the moment anyway. And i really don’t quite know why Tim and Sally Twinam cant understand this a little bit more . Maybe they do understand ? , but still cant find any other way to try and please everyone . Or maybe a little like our friend Roddle , they also left the eb as a pretty complete family-unit , with their own parents and family in tow . Thus having experienced a far more settled existence since being outside of the eb , than some other ex eb might have had.

 Who really knows ? . I’m still trying to figure it out, so as to try and gain a better understanding of it myself . It often feels like i’m trying to slowly piece together a big mystery puzzle. I might go and discuss it on peebs net . But most likely it would only cause more trouble , and get more peoples back up .

 But what ever it is . The over all fact remains , that these cults shouldnt even be allowed to still retain the right to be able to continue to do so much long-term damage and harm to people , they way they still can do.

What is so-wrong with modern society ?, that it would still be fully prepared to be even be allowing it to happen in the first place .

So much for so many people existing within our societies, whom often will still like to discuss about how they feel they truly all follow in the footsteps of the unconditional love of Jesus , and suchlike. Are they saying ? they would feel Jesus footsteps , wouldnt ever involve caring about these sorts of things.

 Just cant help thinking and wondering, if Jesus was still about ,that just maybe a few of these faithful rightous punters , might even tend to recieve a jolly good swift kicking , in the butt . To see if that would even help jolt a few more brain cells into a little more action.

But one thing i noticed about people who have been involved within faith circles . Is it doesnt seem like it always help them all to be an extremely thoughtful bunch.

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About ExEB

I'm a agnostic/atheist . Interested in learning more about science. I also am an "ex-member" of a group most publicly known within modern times, as the Exclusive Brethren. Whom are an off-shoot of the original Plymouth Brethren group. I'd say it likely my personality could possibly be described as quirky.You know ,as in being , unconventional , unorthodox , unusual, off-centre, strange, bizarre, weird, peculiar, odd, freakish, outlandish, offbeat, out of the ordinary, bohemian, alternative, zany I'm sure iv'e been classed as "crazy" . Many times But then, being born into a group like the exclusive brethren. Doesn't lend itself ? to tend to produce things considered as being "very normal" .Does it I escaped the Exclusive Brethren cult as a 15 year old teenager. Even since that time iv'e been trying to adjust to living life outside the cult. With much of my life being lived within the genre of "wild colonial boy" style. In the general sense of a church-rebel picking and choosing from role models who appeared within-life along the way. But as the exclusive brethren cult had traditionally maintained a general church-rule , of need to shun and totally excommunicate any ex member of their group.Treating such people as if they were dead. Thus this situation developed more to do with my need of following traditionally enforced church-rule , as apposed to it being so much about "life-choices". Certain emotional experiences, and parts of life in general, have led to me adopting a sense of low self esteem. Which is a situation i still deal with from time to time. Through my ongoing interest in science. I find i am able to gather more information to help me better understand my situation. Much about life for me, has often seemed like a massive puzzle.With many missing pieces.
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2 Responses to The Herd Mentality

  1. zeroinseeing says:

    That is a genuine life epistle to us ex-peebs. I found on peebs.net the same I found in Brethren, the same judgmental character, of shoving it up the back side of Jesus who said: “Judge not, lest ye be judged.” St.Paul said the same in Romans 2:1 “Inasmuch as you judge another, you condemn yourself.” I wrote the Bible out at the age of 12, even that was unique for a peeb, read most of their ministry by the age of 16 but it left me cold, they had no real answers just dead dogma, with a big dash of fear. I have studied all religions and read most philosophies, even Heraclitus, Thales, Parmenides and even Lao Tzu. There are no answers and I have no answers. Like everyone else, I have concepts and even Science is no different, because Today’s formulas may well be false Tomorrow. The only constant one can give is “Change”. Awake of peebs.net

    • ExEB says:

      Hello Awake.

      Humans can be uncomfortable with the concept of “change”. Because it also means that everything is continually up for re-evaluation.Meaning humans are being asked to “re evaluate” and to actually think about aspects of life,quite often “for themselves”

      Human far prefer to think that what they had heard, was kind of like gospel . It was “forever correct” so therefore there was also no need for “anymore thought” , as nothing should ever have need for anymore change. This means humans have found a way to allow themselves to become lazy (in regards to thought and contemplation of all matters in life)

      Humans prefer to be able to live their life like a large flock of sheep.Only something like 5 percent of human ever actually bother to think “all matters” through for themselves in their life , many/most will “just follow” what they can see and hear other-folks are been saying and doing

      Its good that science doesn’t become stagnant.Its healthy that our science is not something that’s been set in stone

      Brethren and us ex brethren never learned to allow for this kind of life.For in our lives, we were expected to just run as a part of the flock. Like one large bunch of sheep

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