Quote :

ANGER: There is a saying “Frustration begets anger and anger begets aggression.”

end quote

Throughout my blog im fully aware how there is loads of times where i’ve freely expressed anger. Possibly Bordering on a level of aggression maybe sometimes


Well one reason is because i “feel” that it helps me release anger.It helps me let of some steam ,so as to stop well short of point of feeling hostile.And that way i also have no need to bother with violence

Throughout these times there has constantly been other issues im being forced to try and deal with (totally alone) behind the scene.Kind of life issues (9.5 times out of 10) that i just don’t even bother to mention anything about. Issues that i like to try my best to “get over” so as to be able to forget and move on , a.s.a.p . Kind of life issues that (right now) even the mere thought of the idea of myself trying to stop and “remember” and thus also need to kinda almost re-live them all all over again, so as to feel able to begin to do justice of trying to describe them (best as i can while also totally lacking any kind of decent  education)

Well this then always also help to leave me feeling kinda “frustrated” lost and wary before i even attempt to make a start.So i put it off.Just don’t bother.

So my education also help make it hard

Meanwhile i also know that folk reading here through my blog  (will perhaps) more often than not only be able to see signs of an angry person (without ability for them to understand why).Because that’s what they’ll tend to see sitting so raw on the surface

So my lack of education kinda help to also amplify my struggle well too

Some day i hope i’ll finally feel more happier and settled. Some how.I’m working on it (didn’t ever really stop from constantly trying to do my best)Maybe then i’ll be able to go back through some “extra angry” blog post’s of mine, think about it and think-back about what “issues” were busily bugging the hell out of me

I most often decide to refrain from talking about “these issues”.Mainly as i also don’t ever really enjoy to look like im some real weak person

There’s been times  throughout my whole life i might easily have ended up dead just like how a number of other ex eb already have

Therefore i’m thankful and feel in many ways ive actually been pretty lucky really. I’ve at least been one of the “luckier ones

However one thing my continued struggles have helped to teach me.Is that none of those other ex eb folk (in the two Wikipeebia and Wikked Thoughts link’s above) that have sadly passed on in this way.Should ever be considered as being “weak”. Perhaps? they cannot be consider anymore weak than let says (for argument’s sake) what some Jew who might-have chosen to opt-out via suicide, upon having realized how members of his/her family were pretty much all gone-forever more, meaning therefore usual enjoyment of life was wasted and pretty much stuffed-over already anyway’s

And to just top matters off .Let me say while the Jews (with absolutely no disrespect intended) lost family through acts of physical-death. Cult members family death is not about physical death, instead its a psychological kinda death that’s forced upon them (IE: they are being shunned as if dead unto their eb families thoughts of love), that from that moment on, thereafter they must need to struggle and struggle (it can constantly feel so-physically draining)to find some way to try to learn how to live with it, so as to be able to start moving on .Sadly it never  really ever gets to even begin to feel anymore human .It never feels good (unless your mind have been fed cult dribble so much so that it becomes kinda “mindly-soothing” in a pretty much brain dead kinda most terrible highly disgusting manner) And yet even more sadly it is something still far too often being “accepted as normal” social society practice. Because of ? some weird trippy idea of what evidently should “constitute “our” freedom” of religion. And of course our religious liberty(even if there may be more non-believers quietly sitting still right their within their own (the cults and other religious groups as well too) ranks than they had ever even “thought” to bother to figure there might be)

Please forgive me for that spark of anger.Sorry about that.Was this anger evil ? (my anger becomes combined with my feeling’s empathy, within me, cry’s out for these folk. And? “naturally” of course yes indeed “for-myself” as well

That can be what most hard to deal with (speaking from “my own” experience). I understand how the idea of  physical death ( by way of suicide ) can indeed almost feel far less scary.This sapping physical/psychological feeling is  very real.It can nag away at you. Gnaw and gnaw-away at the very-core (high human level of conscience)of what some inner feeling (you feel) is (still “quietly” from only within your very most deep inner thoughts) “offering-you-up” some inner-idea of how you still-constantly felt like perhaps? life was supposed to really be about.And you constant felt like perhaps?  it really should have been-able to have contained a whole lot more feelings of love.The tears begin to no longer even seem valid

These folk were among the real battlers.These folk deserved to be remembered by us

Too many folk are only able to slightly scratch over the surface of knowledge about finer details of these folks lives. I feel quite certain that most all these folk will have experienced the same sort of issues like i have, and then so much more than what i ever will

Accept that they also just decided to finally just give up the struggle.It got too much.I can say that really i don’t blame any of them for choosing to do that either. Because, who the hell am i to judge them? when i never ever walked any mile’s within their shoe’s

For all i know, maybe? some had less education than i have (so i’d understand why they prefer to not even bother to try to write about their life troubles.Partly due to some fear that “what and how” they go about attempting to write, may end up being judged by the well-educated folk.Some who (they may feel) might? secretly say,hey look at “efforts” of that bloody dam uneducated idiot)

These thought might even be unfounded.However,don’t forget we are talking about people who may be lacking confidence .May thus also have low self esteem. And so on

These people may have almost been conditioned to expect the worse.But how could folks feel this way about folk they should usually be more-able to feel safe

Cult existences don’t tend to help build up confidence

Do? many of you none ex eb understand how it has even been claimed that when some people (among suicide cases)were finally buried by their eb family, the eb family purposely chose to drag their coffin along the ground (or something to that effect i don’t have enough time to hunt-down the exact story right now) as a eb way to be able to impose one last-act of shame  (via this  method of exclusive brethren kangaroo court)

Anyway’s. One big problem with choosing this pathway to “opt out”.While it may happen because these folk are really in fact hard folk whom are like tough as nails.

Its really the rest of us people within society (who still remain alive) who will be the folk to really stand to lose the most.Because having not heard full details of all the sorts of issues they had constantly be forced to need to be struggling with

It follows on from that

Too often we are also unable to have really learned anything so much from it.Meaning society also remain somewhat stagnant.And so as such our society is also slowed down in our ability to “promote” the kind of changes that’s needed



About ExEB

I'm a agnostic/atheist . Interested in learning more about science. I also am an "ex-member" of a group most publicly known within modern times, as the Exclusive Brethren. Whom are an off-shoot of the original Plymouth Brethren group. I'd say it likely my personality could possibly be described as quirky.You know ,as in being , unconventional , unorthodox , unusual, off-centre, strange, bizarre, weird, peculiar, odd, freakish, outlandish, offbeat, out of the ordinary, bohemian, alternative, zany I'm sure iv'e been classed as "crazy" . Many times But then, being born into a group like the exclusive brethren. Doesn't lend itself ? to tend to produce things considered as being "very normal" .Does it I escaped the Exclusive Brethren cult as a 15 year old teenager. Even since that time iv'e been trying to adjust to living life outside the cult. With much of my life being lived within the genre of "wild colonial boy" style. In the general sense of a church-rebel picking and choosing from role models who appeared within-life along the way. But as the exclusive brethren cult had traditionally maintained a general church-rule , of need to shun and totally excommunicate any ex member of their group.Treating such people as if they were dead. Thus this situation developed more to do with my need of following traditionally enforced church-rule , as apposed to it being so much about "life-choices". Certain emotional experiences, and parts of life in general, have led to me adopting a sense of low self esteem. Which is a situation i still deal with from time to time. Through my ongoing interest in science. I find i am able to gather more information to help me better understand my situation. Much about life for me, has often seemed like a massive puzzle.With many missing pieces.
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4 Responses to Anger

  1. I grew up around many Brethren (St. Vincent, Pembina, Neche) and went to school with them, lived with them, went to church with some who left Brethren and began attending other churches, and knew some that left all religion behind. Yes, many were angry, and they found their own ways of dealing with it. Happily all I knew did so in what I consider positive ways, although some might think that some of them did so in unusual ways, but who is to judge? I agree with you that expressing anger in writing, in thoughtful and productive ways, is a definite positive outlet. Anger in and of itself is not a bad thing. It’s how it is used, expressed, and handled. If you let it control you, it’s bad. But if you control it, it can be a positive.

    • I meant to include in the first sentence, that some of my own (extended) family were Brethren, also…

      • ExEB says:

        I meant to include

        Well maybe that can help produce empathy.As experiences of hardship can sometime help to do.I sometimes feel, perhaps-so, anyways.Sometimes i feel i need to do anything to try and and at least see somethings positive.Do you feel? so

    • ExEB says:

      “Anger in and of itself is not a bad thing. It’s how it is used, expressed, and handled. If you let it control you, it’s bad. But if you control it, it can be a positive.”

      Hey thanks Trish. I admit i really struggle often.

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