What does “love” mean

(almost? like as if this song were “written” for Bruce Hales)

I feel i notice this word “love” is so easily thrown about .Willy-nilly. Sometimes i wonder how to gauge? what this word means anymore .When it seem everyone easily says i love you (talk the talk).Fewer can then seem to walk the walk also as well though. In my own experience

Let my try and explain the context of where i’m coming from.

A week or so back i had two different phone calls out of the blue, from two different people whom i hadn’t heard from for some time. One was a friend who’s going to be passing through close by the area where i live.Who’s real keen to also be catching up with me again . The other person is a sibling of mine

I mean no disrespect to anyone here. My reason for talking about this, here, is to try and some how figure myself out.Try figure so as to help myself learn exactly whats happening here

The friend never seemed to feel need to mention the word love.Never ever has done They never finish (any phone call to me) by saying “love you”or anything even close to that.And yet, to me it kinda didn’t even really seem wrong, strange or weird to me.I never stopped and thought “my goodness-me” notice how they never said they love me .Why?.Well i already kinda guess how they must sort of feel about me anyways.Without need of any words saying so. Due to how ive already been able to “study” their sort of actions they always made toward me ( my study concluded, via my silent calculation of a number ongoing actions towards me)

My sibling (who’s also about to visit me sometime) closed the end of our conversation on the phone  by out of the blue suddenly declaring “love ya” . Or words to that same effect anyways (can’t say exactly. But feel this is still close enough for interest sake). Anyway i noticed how there was also kind of silent moment (from this sibling), right at that moment when “i didn’t” automatically declare back to them the word “likewise” . Or anything like that . I just kinda remain “dumbfounded” or something and silent anyway,within that sort of somewhat awkward moment.

Who knows how you? folk may now “feel about” hearing me say that. And maybe you’ll even judge me about that. Who knows . I dont know how i should feel .Whether i should worry. Am i? evil. Is there? something wrong with me.

I’ll let you decide.Hopefully someone can help to explain whats wrong (if it is) and why

I can only say this. These day i dont tend to just throw the words “love” around “willy nilly” like anymore. I no longer feel comfortable or like im even being honest in doing that. Especially if i’m also honestly feeling unsure as to how i actually honestly feel anymore sometimes

Its just not me. Im sometimes known as being a bit of a straight shooter i guess you might say.Not someone who feel he can pretend to say he can  love everyone .

I don’t care to go telling tales about siblings here in this blog post . Specially not this sibling of mine. While i might find it hard to pretend to love . Its not hard for me that i sure as hell most certainly still don’t feel like i hate this person. But all i can say is ive heard these words “love ya”  now so many time already before now. But also studied the “actions” at the same time too. And the actions didn’t seem to so-often even come close to managing to matching the words . If im to be honest, sometimes this sibling seemed to act far more like a enemy of mine, than any other enemy ive ever felt i’d met

All im really asking you good folk is this

Where? is the love y’all (come on i don’t know)

Where? is the truth y’all (come on i don’t know)

And where? is the love y’all

To be fair. I don’t blame my sibling one bit. Seem to me we all grew up among groups of believers who would so often throw these kind of words about, willy nilly like as can be .Too often

Like as if that should be quite normal practice for human beings to do

What do you other people feel ? about this subject.

If love is bandied about , willy nilly like ,as if it is honest and freely flowing . Should we also? have such good reason to actually even trust it might honestly be real

How do we gauge reality

Where? is the love y’all (come on i don’t know)

Where? is the truth y’all (come on i don’t know)

And where? is the love y’all

Exclusive Brethren within the time of the brethren review . Freely exchanged “words of love” toward us ex eb . But i also soon notice the word never amount to much more than mere words. They find it easy to talk the talk . But not when walking the walk

Sadly

Now admittedly, exclusive brethren themselves, also never learn what love really is honestly about either.These things tend to get passed along.When one brother is “infecting” minds of another brother And through no real crime of their own either.When lots of it come down to luck of the draw of human-life on earth.If we live in a world where love has been allowed to become lacking so often, as it is been

How? would Jesus feel y’all

That’s most importantly what i’m really interested in asking you good folk most especially of all here

Where? is the love y’all (come on i don’t know)

Where? is the truth y’all (come on i don’t know)

And where? is the love y’all

If Jesus dared return to earth. Would? he feel filled with great joy or extreme shame

Let me ask that too

“Real” Christians (whom are supposedly so many miles apart from exclusive brethren cult member types, or so im told. Can speak word of love so very easily as well too . But i study their actions very intently as well too and few seem (to me) to care actively about folks whom are merely unlucky enough to have been born into cults

Why? do i calculate this

Well when any government would attempt to act to change any rules, to help regulate cult abuses.They (real Christians) will be quick to write in in droves,so as to make their own demand that things would still need to remain exactly the same way as they are already.Sealing the fate of people being born into ongoing faith abuses

And again.Through no real crime of their own.When lots of time it also really still come-down to a whole lot of luck,as well too .When brothers allowed to be constantly “infecting” minds some other-brothers with the really wrong messages here. Even almost being rewarded for doing so (via government charity concession  ) as well

So again all i’m really asking you good folk here is

Where? is the love y’all (come on i don’t know)

Where? is the truth y’all (come on i don’t know)

And where? is the love y’all

I cant help but feel sometime.Love? seem to have lost any real meaning.

Am? i my brothers keeper ( Genesis 4:9)

About ExEB

I'm a agnostic/atheist . Interested in learning more about science. I also am an "ex-member" of a group most publicly known within modern times, as the Exclusive Brethren. Whom are an off-shoot of the original Plymouth Brethren group. I'd say it likely my personality could possibly be described as quirky.You know ,as in being , unconventional , unorthodox , unusual, off-centre, strange, bizarre, weird, peculiar, odd, freakish, outlandish, offbeat, out of the ordinary, bohemian, alternative, zany I'm sure iv'e been classed as "crazy" . Many times But then, being born into a group like the exclusive brethren. Doesn't lend itself ? to tend to produce things considered as being "very normal" .Does it I escaped the Exclusive Brethren cult as a 15 year old teenager. Even since that time iv'e been trying to adjust to living life outside the cult. With much of my life being lived within the genre of "wild colonial boy" style. In the general sense of a church-rebel picking and choosing from role models who appeared within-life along the way. But as the exclusive brethren cult had traditionally maintained a general church-rule , of need to shun and totally excommunicate any ex member of their group.Treating such people as if they were dead. Thus this situation developed more to do with my need of following traditionally enforced church-rule , as apposed to it being so much about "life-choices". Certain emotional experiences, and parts of life in general, have led to me adopting a sense of low self esteem. Which is a situation i still deal with from time to time. Through my ongoing interest in science. I find i am able to gather more information to help me better understand my situation. Much about life for me, has often seemed like a massive puzzle.With many missing pieces.
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