Hurt and pain still goes on and on

A number of ex ebs commented

Most of us were buffed outa the peen church in our teens-we were little more than children or teenagers -Our hurt & pain still goes on & on-Believe me-& I’m 72yrs nearly 73yrs


I was still in the denial stage of PTSD. The horror of having spent my formative years in the EBs had been tucked deep into my unconscious. It was not until my 42nd year when my dad died and I was invited back to my old home that the floodgates opened.


it takes most of us many years to even start to properly process what has occurred, and for the realisation as to losses etc, to really begin to hit home. I say ‘begin’, because for most of us the losses and bereavements keep occurring (to ourselves and our supposedly not-affected-by-EBism children/grandchildren) don’t they, as the years and decades pass after one’s excommunication.

Thankfully this ongoing grieving – some of which is ambiguous loss for the ‘dead while living’ – occurs in amongst the happy, exciting, fulfilling parts of our new lives. Otherwise it’d be just too awful, I imagine.


but the repercussions stay with us always IMO. I just buried my Breth background as best I could for decades.

end quotes

I agree with all that these other ex ebs,ive quoted above, have said . The hurt doesn’t stop after leaving. For one thing, the situation is still going to affect the lives of your own children, who will be born without normal family relationships, with grandparents, uncles,aunts, cousins and so on

There is other situations of what can add to mix of ongoing problems too. For instance, if your siblings, who also left, may be diagnosed to be on aspergers spectrum.

Some people feel good about claiming to have been blessed (by God).But perhaps they may overlook, the possibility, of themselves just being a little more lucky?

What makes matters worse, is that in some countries, the health board wont understand the problem.Why?. Because there is so few people who are effected by these issues,within the modern world,and especially within countries where religion now makes up such a smaller part of the population

This add to the problem.Real big time. As its as if, you must  first need to help educate the health provider, first of all, before they can then even begin to have near-enough knowledge, to be able to know about what they are actually tasked with dealing with

That sucks real big time. Frustrating

1.Firstly, our authorities will allow these cults to continue to exist (breeding children as they go)

2.Authorities (disowning responsibility) claiming how they cannot intervene with freedom of religion (religious liberty), freedom of religion/liberty of what in fact isn’t honestly any kind of real freedom/liberty at all anyway

3.Members whom escape, continue to struggle like hell,for a number of different reason , depending on different scenario. Which leaves people to struggle through disability ,struggling not only necessarily due to health disability either.

4.Then when ex members find themselves falling behind (IE:general citizen ability to thrive in life) , meanwhile the people whom should then be able to step in to help provide proper support, are unqualified (IE: didn’t get taught how), and therefore are also unable to fulfill their job (not that it worries those people,too much though, as its not “their own” loss.Is it?.So therefore they wont be losing too much of their own sleep, at night either, over their lack of ability to provide help for ex members of cults)


Meanwhile the people still remain caught up within cults will naturally also remain very wary of even attempting to try leaving too

As they are also well aware about how there is always this huge mountainous  struggle,up ahead, to clamber over and survive

Such a pity that government authority, may perhaps still remain fairly ignorant in regard of their own knowledge of the full depth of the situation,too.

Or else simply don’t really care (as the situation doesn’t effect themselves at all personally)


Pity we cannot “sue” our governments, for their negligence

As that might help to make them wake up ?

Ex members should start a class action lawsuit, to sue the hell out of our “morally irresponsible” governments. Sue them for millions/billions

Then our government might step up. Get their shit together. Stop all cults from ability to ruin lives


I have a dream

That no children should ever have need for their lives to be disabled,and ruin, by bad luck of being born into cult/faith abuses

Freedom for JW,and for Gloriavale , for Christadephian for Brethren and all others too

About ExEB

I'm a agnostic/atheist . Interested in learning more about science. I also am an "ex-member" of a group most publicly known within modern times, as the Exclusive Brethren. Whom are an off-shoot of the original Plymouth Brethren group. I'd say it likely my personality could possibly be described as quirky.You know ,as in being , unconventional , unorthodox , unusual, off-centre, strange, bizarre, weird, peculiar, odd, freakish, outlandish, offbeat, out of the ordinary, bohemian, alternative, zany I'm sure iv'e been classed as "crazy" . Many times But then, being born into a group like the exclusive brethren. Doesn't lend itself ? to tend to produce things considered as being "very normal" .Does it I escaped the Exclusive Brethren cult as a 15 year old teenager. Even since that time iv'e been trying to adjust to living life outside the cult. With much of my life being lived within the genre of "wild colonial boy" style. In the general sense of a church-rebel picking and choosing from role models who appeared within-life along the way. But as the exclusive brethren cult had traditionally maintained a general church-rule , of need to shun and totally excommunicate any ex member of their group.Treating such people as if they were dead. Thus this situation developed more to do with my need of following traditionally enforced church-rule , as apposed to it being so much about "life-choices". Certain emotional experiences, and parts of life in general, have led to me adopting a sense of low self esteem. Which is a situation i still deal with from time to time. Through my ongoing interest in science. I find i am able to gather more information to help me better understand my situation. Much about life for me, has often seemed like a massive puzzle.With many missing pieces.
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