INVISIBLE Wounds

Inter-generational trauma , is a problem for some ex brethren . Quite possibly a problem even among the brethren members today as well too?. It has a way to affect some people more than it will affect others, as well.

People are impacted differently (by trauma)

Its not like its a “one size fits all” type situation

In my view, i feel like as if there are some ex brethren, who fail to understand that part of the equation. They’ll be inclined to try to judge the way what they’ll see some other ex members are reacting, by comparing “these peoples ways of being” back to themselves and their own-ways of being. As if that would ever work

This come down to narrow mindedness. They’d lack insight. And seriously lack intuition too . Because, human lives are not clone-like. Even within the Brethren group, their “ways of being” are still varied. There is still “the class of Brethren” of who’s lives are more stable, than what the lives of some other Brethren families are like

People will be triggered. But they’ll still need to try and allow room for everyone

Inter-generational trauma , affect ex cult members lives, as it does also with the lives of so many first nation peoples too, all around the world. And likewise with the lives of the African people who’s ancestors were used as slaves, and had suffered from terrible abuses. And likewise even the lives of the Jews as well too

Inter generational trauma’s remains as a “common thread” existing among all these peoples lives

Now, there are some ex eb who’ll be against the ways of anyone of us who’d “dare to compare” the lives of the ex cult member, with the lives of the Jews (for instance). They might say, well the ex cult members were “never ever murdered” were they, or had never ever been forced to face extreme violence to level of like what the Jews were forced to face . And yes, this is very true. We wouldn’t want to pretend as if the ex cult members struggle had gone to anywhere near the same level.Thankfully it hasn’t

But this misses the point

This still doesn’t take away from the fact that “the whole lot of us” are still all in the same boat, within the sense that many of our families would now all be struggling against the affect of this problem with inter-generational trauma 

We all relate to that ( inter-generational trauma ) part of the equation

By us saying this, this doesn’t mean that we necessarily see ourselves and our own lives (as ex cult member) as being anywhere near as worse off , as like what some other groups of peoples lives, have been 

We don’t need to

Even so, we are still able to relate to their struggle, far better ourselves now. Because of the way how we have now been able to experience the same affect, to some level . In a way, perhaps this could be described as being “a form of enlightenment”

Through our groups, own struggle, we can now find a way to better relate to the struggles of other peoples groups of people too. We gained a sense of solidarity with them. By relating to “how they’d be feeling”. We’d have been able to have gained “some first-hand” experience, for ourselves, now too.

It is all a part of learning about “the human interconnection”. 

Isn’t it?

Many of us ex cult member have come away, from the cult, while still clinging on to the “black and white” ways of thinking, and of seeing things . I feel, that perhaps this makes it harder for ex member to see the subtle interconnection.

That’s reason why they’ll deny that there be any link “whatsoever at all” between the lives of the-Jew,or the ex Brethren

They’d fail to see the “subtle links” that interconnect

Because of the black and white way of thinking, they’d say that unless a cult member had been able to say that they’d experienced what its like to be starved to death, and/or what it was like to face the gas chamber and so on. Then there’d  also be absolutely no way that they should compare anything about their own lives, with lives of the Jews, to any degree at all 

This is the “black and white way of thinking”. IE: either /or. This is the narrow minded way, of what fails to see subtle gray and interconnected colors in between 

1 The Jews

2 The African slave

3. The Cherokee

4. Us Brethren and ex Brethren

Even although the-struggles of the groups of people above would be varied and some would be way far worse than what any of our own experience has ever been like. And yet, we’d still be able to relate totheir feeling of helplessness“. Still relate to their feeling of the loss of hope too. Relate to the way they’d sometimes possibly have struggles against alcoholism, and/or drugs, and anger.Relate to the divorce and extent of broken marriages/relationships as well . We’d relate to the ongoing damage done through inter generational trauma   

We can still “directly relate to” all that

Cant we?

Its about opening ourselves up to see how interconnected we all actually are, in one way or another (us humans).Sometimes in “subtle way” of what can very easily be overlooked too. That way, we also could begin to build bridges?. Begin to learn how another persons suffering, is in a strange way really still “just another part of”our own suffering” as well too

We are allhumans (one people) . Belong to same the same tribe (once we put aside the bullshit)

Because of the way what our lives all interconnect (1. IE: we share suffering). None of us can find a way in which to make ourselves become totally immune to it

Because of the way how our sufferings are related (even although they’d not always be “completely the-same” in all regard)

The funny thing is, that had we not ever been born into a cult, and been able to suffer the consequence, inter generational trauma personally for ourselves . Then there’s also a higher chance that we’d have then also remained totally ignorant, to knowing about “what the affects” may feel like , too

Wouldn’t we? 

Because, to understand, properly, then it really first require each one of us human, to need to “experience it”, personally, ourselves as well too

Doesn’t it?

We might have been more inclined to always remain the narrow minded type of red-neck human being, who’d be heard to say, “why won’t those first nation people just buck their ideas up then, shame on them” . Or just “look at all those large numbers of them American African folks in Jail, they’d all just need to buck their ideas up too, and learn to do better”

Because of how, we’d fail to see and understand the subtle grey areas of life .

Right?

In some ways, our own experiences, as ex cult member has panned out to be like  “a gain” for us.

We all been able to have gained something 

Through the struggles involved in our own experiences, hopefully we have then now learned how to relate a little better, to the struggles of what “the others” are also tasked with struggling to overcome , as well

That’s “a quality that our world , right now, is in even more great need of . Going forward, the human might very well soon need to try better to find ways in which “to relate” to the ways of other people too

Life going forward might require human to learn to relate to one and other better. And being how the “playing field” has just been re-leveled that little bit more. And now nearly everyone is sitting the same boat together. Perhaps it could turn out to be like “a silver lining” 

Everyone’s been presented with a situation to learn to relate to other

Right now, there are folks who are now also faced with living within similar situation what can kind of feel “oppressed” . There will be cases of families who’ll now be more inclined to be fighting and falling apart with each other, far easier. They be struggling with similar type money woes of like what had previously only been experienced by the families with poorer and more dysfunctional background . Far more people will suddenly be finding themselves “to be homeless” and so on. They’ll be more likely to feel “loss of hope” and also the sense of helplessness that goes along with it

The playing field have been leveled 

 

 

 

About ExEB

I'm a agnostic/atheist . Interested in learning more about science. I also am an "ex-member" of a group most publicly known within modern times, as the Exclusive Brethren. Whom are an off-shoot of the original Plymouth Brethren group. I'd say it likely my personality could possibly be described as quirky.You know ,as in being , unconventional , unorthodox , unusual, off-centre, strange, bizarre, weird, peculiar, odd, freakish, outlandish, offbeat, out of the ordinary, bohemian, alternative, zany I'm sure iv'e been classed as "crazy" . Many times But then, being born into a group like the exclusive brethren. Doesn't lend itself ? to tend to produce things considered as being "very normal" .Does it I escaped the Exclusive Brethren cult as a 15 year old teenager. Even since that time iv'e been trying to adjust to living life outside the cult. With much of my life being lived within the genre of "wild colonial boy" style. In the general sense of a church-rebel picking and choosing from role models who appeared within-life along the way. But as the exclusive brethren cult had traditionally maintained a general church-rule , of need to shun and totally excommunicate any ex member of their group.Treating such people as if they were dead. Thus this situation developed more to do with my need of following traditionally enforced church-rule , as apposed to it being so much about "life-choices". Certain emotional experiences, and parts of life in general, have led to me adopting a sense of low self esteem. Which is a situation i still deal with from time to time. Through my ongoing interest in science. I find i am able to gather more information to help me better understand my situation. Much about life for me, has often seemed like a massive puzzle.With many missing pieces.
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