They are about as remorseful, as what a dog is also like. A dog that decide to just shit in the pavement in the street, right there in front of everyone else, after you just cared-enough to do you best and kindly take it for a walk
Religion seem too often a little bit akin to someone having a lobotomy ,without need of any form of actual surgery
The picture above.Could easily be taken as looking rather similar to memories of what i also remember of some theists standing and busily praying in church.
Both images (the one above and the ones still etched into my memory)seem to have much the same vacant type look
How can someone? really be expected to still be able to feel honest remorse.If they have been rendered brain-dead via their “out of control” faith
Back in the year 2010, i had first talked to a first cousin on mine, on the phone.I spoke to this cousin (whom remains within the exclusive brethren still.You know the group of “Christian believers” whom in more recent years have now been trying to pose as Plymouth brethren ,so as to try and escape from some of their bad exclusive brethren legacy)
I told him of the sexual abuse that i had experienced.I gave him the name of the abuser involved.Mentioned the name of the local priest with whom i had first reported the sexual abuse to.
Then when he then replied to me by email.He said that he had approached someone in the locality where our brethren meeting was,so as to have them look into it.So as to see how this case of sexual abuse was handled .
He then wrote to say that he was sympathetic with the trauma i had experienced in my life . (trauma that in my mind, not only should include my own experience of more than one aspect of sexual abuse, but also the trauma of enforced excommunication of members of my own family,as well as enforced excommunication of some of our cousins as well too.Along with the experience of seeing a brother of mine looking so thin ,that he were in fact close to death.So close in fact, that it was also this brother’s own doctor who in the end was forced to ask the brethren to please accept our brother back into fellowship to be reunited with his wife and children,to save him from dying of starvation and heartbreak.And so much more other situations of trauma, that it’s just far too much for me to even care to think of again so as tell you readers about everything right now)
He suggested that he himself had experienced being unwell in his own mind too.Suggesting to me that Satan takes advantage of this.Telling me that what had got him through this
“was my simple link with Jesus as Saviour, and I am sure He can help you.”
He went on to say
I am not talking about “coming back”, but a real experience with Christ that gives a peace and settlement beyond what we would have thought possible.
I would like to talk to you about this and also will get back to you about what you raised as soon as possible.
As if ? im going to be so likely to still be able to even trust any member of the exclusive brethren so-quickly again (including members of my own flesh and blood) , after having also already personally experience the utter disgraceful evil sham that the so called “brethren review” obviously was (no need to rely only on my account, as there are also so many other ex eb too, whom can also help verify to this fact)
From then on. Emails (back and forth) continued between the two of us for awhile.
So (by email) i basically told him that i just wasn’t too keen to drop my guard once again and freely put trust in any exclusive brethren .Mentioning that i hoped he wouldn’t take this as if it were meant as a personal insult . It was more to do with being once hurt badly, then twice-shy
Pointing out how i was now naturally feeling pretty damn wary of contact with any brethren members
I relayed to this cousin how traumatic it had all been for me, to be forced to experience the freely flowing tears of my own mother, when we were shut-up (stopped from attending church and also from ability of having any contact with any members of the brethren. ) and were being visited by two priest whom were involved in priestly visits that were supposedly designed to get us right with God (but to-me had in effect felt much like i were personally experiencing the same type of Gestapo-like visits like what many Jews were forced to need to try to be living with)
In the end i decided i would need to leave.To save my mother from tears that i somehow felt guilty of causing (due to anger i felt,because i had not received any form of professional counselling in regards to the sexual abuse). There we were (me and mum) at a time when it was during the mid term school holiday break. Both of us shut-up and separated from having contact with brethren fellowship, and along with also not being supposed to be having contact with so called worldly folk either (non members of exclusive brethren) I’m 15 and a half years of age. I leave home and the brethren, by riding off on my push bike.Making contact with a excommunicated sister of mine whom i had been forced to not be able to see or have any contact with for around about 10 years
And yet i still don’t get to get any professional form of counseling. Because sex abuse is not really something that is ever that easy for anyone to discuss. (at first the brethren threaten to involve the police, so as to try and just have me returned to my mother.
Although they didn’t bother.Perhaps because they were just far too afraid? that i might then suddenly decide to blow the whistle
Brethren blame? this trauma experienced, on Satan
I pointed all this out to this cousin, and also pointed out that in the exclusive brethren review , i had been forced to experience my brother (whom i loved) deciding to try and commit suicide, by swallowing a whole bottle of sleeping pills (the very same brother who i had previously seen near to death by starvation due to heartbreak and loneliness).He tried to commit suicide, because (unknown to me at the time) during the brethren review a brother in law of our had demanded that he would need to cease contact with me for awhile while they would try and manipulate me into agreeing to come back into exclusive brethren fellowship
I emailed my detailed account of these traumatic feelings to this exclusive brethren first cousin of mine at the date 27.1.2010 . However i still hadn’t had even had any reply back from him at all by 8. 2. 2010 . When i emailed him again, to just try and remind him that trauma isn’t something that goes away.Specially when trauma has been building over years.Reminding him that i chose to contact him , being that he was also one of the brethren whom had first chosen to make contact with me during the review, after 30 years of excommunication , suggesting that he too was also honestly interested in wanting to try and help make-amends for the bad way that we had been mistreated
Evidently brethren idea of honest remorse doesn’t go so far as to see any good reason to care to keep in touch and take action
On 11/02/2010 my cousin finally care to at least reply telling me that the problem is that the person whom he had contacted (to get to look into the case of sexual abuse) had evidently had to go away somewhere suddenly (why there was only one person whom could help ,who knows?, when in fact there were some others whom were also well aware.Even if they might have not all known the full exact details.This also included the abuser)
My cousin writes a few words trying to suggest to care (but i cannot help but be thinking he is very likely also just bullshitting too)
I email him again on the 16.2.2010.Basically expressing my feelings that brethren idea of time is giving me the idea that brethren don’t consider time to be of any real essence in life
I expressed feeling that i had been busily wishing that our father (who had died of cancer at a time when i was still aged under two year old) had of been able to be allowed to use a condom.As it might then have also helped to save us all from some heartbreak and sadness. I told him to try to read-up on some good information about effect of sexual abuse and P.T.S.D etc
I expressed how the sad situation had also had some detrimental effect on my own children’s right to be able to fully experience real happiness as well too. Pointing out that my children had no choice in the matter of who their grandparents were to be.That was down to luck of the draw
I pointed out that exclusive brethren and the act of constantly delaying matters,was seeming to be two things that all too often had seemed to go hand in hand together
I then emailed this cousin once again on 23/02/2010 . Asking him had he learned anything more,or did he even now know anything about how? long the delay was likely going to be. Told him that i had just gotten in touch with a group that is called victim support
On 26/02/2010 i then finally do hear something back from this cousin. He says
I have heard back from Auckland. Enquiries have been made but the facts are obscure because of the passage of time and also ….. …… has died.
The stress you say that you are under is concerning. If you think it would help to go to the Police it is your right to do so. If counseling would help then you should get that. I would definitely look at helping by paying for counseling – it is important for family to help each other out.
I hope this helps. I would also consider any ideas you may have as to how I could assist you further. (priest’s name been removed by me)
So then on 27/02/2010 i again reply .Basically pointing out that it seems like brethren are intent on constantly bullshitting to me, to just claim that the “facts are obscure”
I point out that our mum is still alive.I point out that my brother in law,whom himself had indeed personally verbally discussed having pretty much full knowledge himself of the sex abuse, to-me during the brethren review.And even to the extent of discussing full-knowledge of exactly where-about one instance of sex abuse had actually taken place
I also pointed out that my brother (the one ive mentioned whom had tried committing suicide within the review) knew at least some details . Seeing that it was he whom had personally answered a phone call (that were made to his own house during the review) from the exact same priest whom had now died, which was a phone made to me purposely to offer me an apology. (these details can still be double checked,as phone records can most likely still always be found to help confirm it) My brother and his wife too, along with my brother in law and my sister as well were all sitting at the same table when the phone call from the priest was handed on to me
Beside all this. The abuser is still alive as well too.There is plenty of brethren and even ex brethren still alive too, whom should at least still be able to attest to the fact that the abuser was indeed put under assembly discipline and was himself shut-up right-away after the time i had first disclosed information of the sexual abuse, to our local priest (the one whom has now died).Not being accepted back into fellowship for awhile, until after they had first “served-time” under exclusive brethren method of in-house discipline
Besides this. I did in fact also happen to quickly mention a few slight details of my experience of sex abuse , to one ex exclusive brethren first cousin of mine.Even if it only occurred somewhat reluctantly If need be. i’m still pretty sure this cousins memory can also soon enough be added in as accumulative evidence
So.Why have i not? (thus far) gone-ahead and chosen to just report this situation to the police
I might not be a believer anymore.I do now lack any ability to see good reason to believe in any God.
But that fact still dont also mean that im lacking in empathy . I happen to understand that in reality we are all victims of a form of deeply ingrained religious nastiness
Atheist don’t bother to pray.For indeed they see that there is in fact very little sense in doing so.However atheists still try to hold on any slim-hope they “hope” they can.Hoping that against all odds,there may still be by some “slim chance” that people might come to their senses.Some day
This is.We still long to be able to see our own flesh and blood differently.To not need to continue to admit that our own flesh and blood, could ever really have been so heartless
If you still don’t like to believe me.See more information here in regard to who is more likely to feel compassion http://news.berkeley.edu/2012/04/30/religionandgenerosity/
While my exclusive brethren first cousin whom i had emailed back and forth with, in regard to sex abuse, might lack in empathy. So much so, that the thoughtless ignorant brain-dead moron might also have been inclined to be able to think i’d ever be so-likely to feel happy to just have allowed that the police might just suddenly have arrived on my elderly mothers door step . With accusations of sex abuse.And then set-about pressing her for information
Its long overdue time the brethren were to wake up from their slumber.
Do they feel remorse?
Seems pretty unlikely
The brain dead throng have remained so foolishly constantly pissed out of their wee Brethren brains on the wine of Brethren-ism, for so bloody long now.
That it almost seems to me, like many of them might just as well have also actually had a lobotomy, through surgery.
They had the best chance they ever had had ,to finally put thing right, within the exclusive brethren review
But what? did they rather choose to do instead
They far rather to still follow along behind the unbroken line of folly and foolishness
Anytime brethren decide to start the ball rolling, and like to try suing me.The way they like throwing their weight around against some other folk
Might? be the best thing that could ever happen to me.As all i really need now, is to have something to really help motivate me